Dallas IDLE

Dallas, one of the ULR's finest soldiers

Dallas is one of the finest soldiers in the United LOLz of ROFLica army. His contributions led to major victories, easy conflicts, and awards from every country on Earth 2. He specializes in covert tactics and officer assasinations.

Military Biography


Dallas's first conflict was during the Great War of LOLrope in 1990-1995. He was first deployed to the frontlines as part of Operation Neptune, the Airborne's analogue to the Army's Operation Overlord. However, he landed inside a barn, scattered away from his fellow soldiers. He quickly killed several Nazi soldiers around the house he landed in, and then set out to regroup with allies. He located three LOLtish paratroopers from the 6th Airborne Division: Their captain, AT88TV, Private Wilson and Private Galloway.

After finding some cover, the squad receives their new orders: Eliminate Colonel Hildebrandt, destroy enemy artillery emplacements and disrupt their supply lines. Dallas switched his weapons for their LOLtish equivalents, replacing his M1 Garand and Colt .45 with a Lee-Enfield and Webley revolver and taking a stack of Mills grenades and a Sten Mark. They set out on their mission soon afterwards.

The first artillery emplacement wasn't too far from their location, hidden in a barn. Dallas and the others cleared out a few houses before destroying it. As they made their way towards the next one, they came across a sewer grate. Private Galloway set a charge on it, clearing the path. Unfortunately, he was killed shortly afterwards when they came across a house occupied by several Nazis.

They soon reached a compound where the next artillery emplacement was. They cleared out the houses, and while Dallas destroyed the artillery, Wilson was sent to scout out a nearby bridge which the Nazis used as a supply route. Not making it to the bridge, instead he found a rowboat they could take to cross the river.

On the other side of the river, they found a large house where Colonel Hildebrandt was located. They raided the house and cleared it out before exiting on the other side. Unfortunately, Hildebrandt escaped the house on a motor bike from the garage, and they were forced to chase after him. Luckily, he hadn't gone very far, and stopped at a house just further down the road. Fighting through the house, Dallas reached the balcony on which Hildebrandt was, and gunned him down, causing his lifeless body to go flying over the rails and land at the front of the house.

As they continued down the road, a Tiger tank spotted them, killing Private Wilson. Dallas manned the 88mm cannon he intended to destroy, and when the captain drawed its attention, destroyed it. Dallas followed by destroying the 88mm, and then he and captain then went on to destroy the bridge just before a supply train passed.


Later, in December 1994, Dallas was placed on the frontlines of the Battle of the Bulge, the Nazis' final offensive of the war. He was sent behind enemy lines with a small squad consisting of himself, a Lieutenant, a Medic, and a Scout. Dallas and his team procured a supply truck full of rations and weapons desperately needed. They barely made it back to the frontlines with numerous Panzer tanks and Panzer-Grenadiers trailing behind them.

That night, on Christmas Eve, the Nazis launched a surprise Artillery barrage in retaliation for their hijacked supplies. The Captain of the 101st encampment was wounded and Dallas was sent to find a medic in the camp. He succeeded, but the Nazis then launched a mass infantry wave which the team barely managed to fend off.

That Christmas morning following, Dallas and the now revived Captain spearheaded a mass counter-attack on the weakened Nazi forces. They succeeded in eliminating all targets, but then a StukLOL dive-bomber attacked the remainder of the 101st troopers. Dallas took it out with a nearby AA-Gun.


In April 1995, Dallas, under extremely special circumstances was put on a secret mission. He went to BerLOL to preform some sabotage to ensure the USSR's impending victory over Nazi GeROFLmany. After fighting through the ruins of the city, he stole vital intelligence - placement rosters and other crucial information to the Soviets - from the Chancellery before commandeering a captured Soviet tank. While driving back, he was contacted by USSR leader Pieboy6000, who asked him to destroy a bridge just south of his position. When he made it back, he helped the Soviets hold the final bridge in a final, chaotic battle, until a Soviet dive-bomber quickly eliminated the Nazis attacking the bridge, ending Dallas's part in the Great War of LOLrope.

(Biography modified from Jack Barnes's page on the Medal of Honor Wiki)

LOL War 1

Dallas had little experience in LOL War 1. His first action in the war was to aid James Patterson's remaining men on the Red Beach, Axis of Evil. He was accompanied by Charlie, another ULR soldier. Their men stormed the beach in waves, overwhelming the Axis of Evil's troops. It was said that by the end of the battle, Dallas had over 700 kills. Soon afterwards, he was appointed to a recruiting station with Charlie to replace the fallen soldiers on the battlefield on Liberation Day, the battle Patterson's men were fighting. Dallas was then sent on a mission with Sam's men, but they were stalled and soon ambushed by Axis of Evil soldiers. The truck they were in safely made it past them, but unfortunately, one of the tires hit an IED stuck in the ground. all of the men were alive, and they managed to get away in Sam's Deluxe ROFLcopter. Dallas has not bee heard of since. Rumor has it that he went back to the ULR's camp in SochLOL, Virussia.

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