Microsoft Sam is the famous text to speech voice included with Windows 2000 and Windows XP. He is also included in the TTS Program Speakonia, but his speech patterns differ from the Narrator version. Sam is a speech synthesizer provided for use with applications that use the Microsoft Speech API (SAPI). Sam is known for appearing in hundreds of YouTube videos in which he sings, read errors and signs, do voice-overs, play games, and do all sorts of similar activities.
February 17, 2000
The Guy who reads Signs, Errors, and other random Crap; hanging with Mike and Mary
ROFL City, CA
Microsoft Sam was actually a normal sentient program back in his early days. He was born in an early prototype of Windows 2000, and later he transferred to Speakonia, where he met his friends, Mike and Mary. After hanging out for a while, Sam and Mary started to date, but the relationship did not last, and resulted in them breaking up. Sam was so depressed that he accidentally walked in front of a truck carrying ROFLcopter fuel, which damaged his right eye, and infected his speech processor, making him say the infamous "soi". Sam and his friends then decided it was time to move away from Speakonia, and ventured into the real world, and that's where they met Thunderbirds101, and many other Text-to-speech officers. They were warmly welcomed aboard the Interview With a YouTuber by Domingo0022, and their adventures began.
Sam's personality differs from TTS video maker to TTS video maker, but in general he is known to be very angry and violent, often seriously hurting and sometimes killing others for petty reasons in his rage. Other times, he just does it because he feels like it, such as when he can't read errors/signs/etc. and somebody else temporarily takes over. He will come back and murder this person and take back his place. He shows no remorse for doing this whatsoever, and somehow rarely gets in trouble for it.
Sam doesn't like to wear shorts, even when it's hot.
There are many universes relating to Microsoft Sam, and all of them are uniquely different. Since so many people make videos involving MS Sam, this page can't account for every single one of them, but here are 38 of the many TTS universes that are out there.
- In the Thunderbirds101 Universe, Microsoft Sam, Mike and Mary are blood brothers/sister, as revealed in Microsoft Sam reads Funny Windows Errors S2 Finale. They originally lived on Earth as normal, but the devastating events of the S4 Finale of Microsoft Sam reads Funny Windows Errors left them in shambles. After a short time in Hell at the hands of the Devil's Hell Star, Microsoft Sam and Radar Overseer Scotty fled to Earth 2, where they sought permanent refuge.
- In the Wonka0111 Universe, Microsoft Sam is dating Mary [Who is not his sister], and Mike is Sam's brother, though Mike and Sam are often rivals who both want to date Mary. Sam and Mike also have a grandpa, Microsoft Geezer. In addition, Scotty has a brother and/or cousin named Random High-Pitched Speakonia Voice Who Does The Intro, and both are distant cousins of Linux Anna.
- In the Akriloth2160 Universe, Microsoft Sam, Mike and Mary are friends, neither Sam nor Mike are romantically involved with Mary, and Scotty's first clone was corrupted, and never became evil. A war known as The Epic War was fought in this Universe.
- In the Supermariogeek7979 Universe, Microsoft Sam and Mike are brothers, but Mary has no blood relations with them. Mike is also dating Mary, who was once with Sam, but they broke up. Sam and Scotty are best friends, and Gordon leads an army of Taco Warriors from Domingo0022's Palace on Earth 2.
- In the Dantheman2funny Universe, Microsoft Sam, Mike and Mary are considered siblings, as they live with Bill Gates in his million dollar mansion. Sam gets up to all sorts in the 2Funny Universe, such as reviewing funny videos, playing video games, looking at funny pictures, and even going on adventures.
- In the Thewarragulman Universe, Microsoft Sam, Mike and Mary are brothers and sister. They used to live with Sam and Mary is Sam's wife. Sam and Mary have 2 kids named Angela and Lilith like in the Sims trilogy, as the universe relates there. But not much is known yet.
- In the warc9 Universe, Microsoft Sam, Mike and Mary are brothers and sister. They live in the warc9 mansion. Most of the time, Sam is on his computer reading errors...and getting viruses e.g. The Rainbow Virus and the WTF Virus.
- In the Thunderbirds76 Universe, Microsoft Sam and the gang live in the Thunderbirds76 TV Headquarters, an over £9000 mansion on the outskirts of the town that Thunderbirds76 lives. Mainly, Sam is on his PC Reading errors. At other times, he is eating IWAY Cookies or performing experiments in the labs.
- In the ShadowFrost88 Universe, Microsoft Sam, Mike and Mary are brothers and sister. They used to live on Earth, but after the devastating events as mentioned above, Sam, Mike, and Mary escaped from Earth, Nowadays on the Carbon Copy of Earth. ShadowFrost88 has since abandoned the space station concept, as that would wind up being destroyed a couple years back. He is also referred to as Samuel, at times.
- In the RorytheRetrokid Universe, Sam, Mike and Mary have been friends since age 4, they live onboard the RorytheRetrokid spacestation and near Alexandra Palace in North London
- In the Pieboy6000 Universe, Sam is the brother of Mike and Mary, and compared to other universes, is a lot more friendly to Radar Overseer Scotty. The team usually end up being taken on missions of large scale, usually involving the fate of the whole galaxy. He is the military commander of the United Lols of Roflica. Pieboy has since abandoned his own universe outside his error series. In war series, his universe merges with Thunderbirds101's universe.
- In the Exiledkraken Universe, Sam is a big, bald, muscley man with a big, bushy mustache, but lacks a nose. He is also a nudist. His only goal in life is to get Evan to love him. His quest of love is often intervened with lust and Sam ends up raping Evan. He also has an obsession with pickles and oftentimes incorporates his obsession with the lust he has for Evan and uses pickles as sex toys.
- In the Thunderbirds321 Universe, Microsoft Sam, Mike and Mary are brothers and sister and Scotty is their cousin. They live in a house. Microsoft Jacob is their brother. (Jacob's Voice is actually Adult Male #2.)
- In the Capa881 Universe, Microsoft Sam, Mike and Mary are brothers and sister, when Scotty is just Microsoft Sam closest friend. He never showed up as Scotty, but as a Robot, because his body was almost blown up. They all live in Portugal but Sam and Scotty go to Capa881 Space Station for safekeeping. Sam reads the error and gets pissed of with some. Some of them even come in Portuguese and Scotty has to read it for him. Microsoft Sam's PC has been destroyed five or six times already and Scotty has been thrown out of the Spaceship once.
- The natesworld2K Universe somewhat follows the Thunderbirds101 Universe because Sam, Mike, and Mary are brothers and sister. Scotty is their cousin.
- In the gameyguy123 universe, Microsoft Sam, Mike, and Mary are blood siblings. His relations to Scotty or Anna are not revealed yet.
- In FloydPinkerton's (new) universe, Sam is (speculated) to have little relation to other voices, however, this early on, it is up for debate.
- In the alcid34 universe of ErrorMan2331, Sam is a big, muscular guy living with his friends and his boss, Timothy Alcid, in the Alcid34 Productions Studio Center in Lynnwood, WA. Not much is known about Sam and his friends, due to being hired into the studio center recently.
- In the AT88TV universe, Sam, Mike and Mary are blood brothers and Scotty is their half cousin. They have a friendly rivalry but have never assualted one another.
- In the Davemadson universe, Sam and Mary are brother and sister. Mike is Sam's cousin and Mary's boyfriend. And Anna is Sam's girlfriend. Jimmy (Speakonia Male #2), Hank (Speakonia Male #3), Beulah (Speakonia Female #1), Abby (Speakonia Female #2), Guy (originally Speakonia Male #1, and later Speakonia Male #4), Scotty (Speakonia Male #1, Guy's twin brother), and davemadson (as himself) are Sam's friends who live next door. Sam and his friends usually encounter Looney Tunes Intro Bloopers, Funny Signs, and such. [The only episodes the Sam is NOT present are: LTIB 32, 69, 79, Raised Zebra Crossing, V of Doom Bloopers, PBS Logo Bloopers 4. Also in Davemadson's LITB fbloopers 33, Sam survived an execution attempt after he though he murdered Radar overseer Scotty. The to would not return alive and well in the next episode.]
- He is also famous because of his control-freak tendencies, and always make Scotty's leaving issue is JUSTIFIED (JUSTIFIED My ASS!) and thinks that he owns davemadson's studio.
- In the FirestrikeZeppelin universe, Sam is a leading ruler in Spencon(Ion). He is also part of the Trans-Faction group called the Cult of Errors. He actually reads less errors than Mike in the series.
- In the kittykat29 universe (aka Microsoft Island), Sam is king of the whole island, with Mike and Mary as his heirs and servants. Sam was attacked by Microsoft Frog (voiced by kittykat29) in episode 3 of the Error series (not yet titled) when he was killed by a bomb. Mike took over until Sam was reincarnated in episode 4. Sam is often accompanied by Clippy the paperclip, a now retired Office Assistant from Microsoft Office. Anna is their cousin (she was taken out of Darkness by fairies) and Scotty is their battlefield scanner in times of danger.
- In the Thunderbirds360TV universe, Sam, Mike, and Mary are blood brothers/sister, and Scotty is their cousin. They live in LOLzil. Sometimes they go to Matth360's space station if anything bad happens, like an earthquake.
- In the DayleLucy101 universe, Microsoft Sam is Microsoft Mary and Microsoft Mike's brother. They have a male ROFL Robot, and Scotty is his friend.
- In the ThePermian99 universe, Microsoft Sam and Mary are brother and sister and Mike is their cousin, they live in the ULR but sometimes stay for a while in ThePermian Center. They originally lived in ThePermian99's Windows XP Computer before Permie smashed the screen and pulled them out and put them on the 100th floor in his tower.
- In The Cooper TV Studios Universe, Sam lives in Cooper's Town, United Federation of Pi, with his brother, Mike, Microsoft Mary, Microsoft Anna, and Scotty. Sam likes Pi Pies and cannot stand Asphalt Cookies. He reads signs, errors, and once competed in a game show with Mike and Scotty.
- In the mutsuloveproductions universe, it's like a Hamtaro TV series style. Microsoft Sam, Mike, Mary, Anna, LH Michael, and LH Michelle are all the best of friends and Anna is more than just his best friend. She's his true girlfriend and roommate and together they both live with Danielle Bowden and her family in Ohio. They go to what is similar to the Ham-Ham Clubhouse called the Microsoft Headquarters (or Microsoft HQ) with their computer pals: Mike, Mary, LH Michael, LH Michelle, Boss (voiced by RoboSoft 2), Radar Overseer Scotty, Dexter (voiced by RoboSoft 3), Pashmina (voiced by Speakonia Female 1), Penelope (only communicates with simple computer sounds), Amanda (voiced by RoboSoft ), Sandy (voiced by Speakonia Female 2), Stan (voiced by Speakonia Male 2), and Maxwell (voiced by Speakonia Male 3). Snoozer, the abandoned and always-sleepy Little Einsteins laptop, also lives there. However, the show is not yet made, but mutsuloveproductions is planning on it.
- In the kelly langmack universe, Microsoft Sam was Christian, now he is Jewish.
- In thetick532 universe, Sam is a chirstan and he is constantly pestered by the Devil and She-Devil who want to steal his soul. He also is starting to become friends of the Scotty of his universe.
- In Guyisbackable universe, Sam is Mike's brother, but Mary is Sam's girlfriend. Scotty is Mary's brother. He is with his recurring friends as from davemadson's universe except those who are not the regular guys. There are some intruders like Gordon (who first appeared in Hijacking with Sony Vegas' 2nd episode and voiced by Speakonia Male 6), which tried to fire Sam for stuttering and revoke his license of journalism. Some people except for Sam, Mike and Mary are: Scotty, Robert (voiced by Speakonia Male 2), Jeff (voiced by Speakonia Male 3), Alan (voiced by Speakonia Male 7), the rival of Microsoft Sam, Mike and Mary, and Gay Boy (voiced by Speakonia Male 4) who arrested Alan. Mr. Fatty is one of them and has an identical voice of Alan. Sometimes, Mr. Fatty replaces Alan in Guyisbackable's future videos and vice versa. Scarlet (voiced by Speakonia Female 1) and Sue (voiced by Speakonia Female 2) sometimes appear. Guyisbackable's videos are made in Sony Vegas. Due to the concepts made as Mii's the characters always stay on center if not customized on PowerPoint on a background.
- On the Hijacking with Sony Vegas intro, Sam says "Hello. This is Microsoft-soft-soft-soft-soft..." until the explosion, and rotates. That was just before the title card of the series in the intro (at the end).
- Some characters did a name change in April 13, 2014, while they slept.
- In Thunderbirds205's Universe, Microsoft Sam is a Fatass who is reading Signs, Errors & News Bulletins. He hates Scotty And Mike (Scotty is he's eating Baloney Sandwiches & Mike because he Talks Like A Lady. In The Series Finale Of Microsoft Sam reads Funny Windows Errors, He's Got Injured, In The Finale, Microsoft Sam Says Sorry To Mike, He Gets Hit By A Car, Mike Will Read The Errors & Requests, Sam Has Ended, So In The Finale, nkrs200 Comes Back On YouTube, And nkrs200's Sam Asked About Thunderbirds205's Sam Getting Hit By A Car And Injured, He Was Staying In The Hospital Until He Dies. R.I.P Sam. So That's Thunderbirds205's Universe. :)
- In the nkrs200 Universe, Microsoft Sam is based similarly off of Thunderbirds101's Sam, but instead of Earth being destroyed in the Thunderbirds101 series, the event never happened due to the fact that Sam is on a different time stream. (NOTE: This will be explained in Microsoft Sam's Big Vacation.) Another thing to note is that Sam can actually show emotions, facial expressions, and movements.
- In Tigerclaw64's universe (active in DeviantArt and YT), Sam is much older than Mike of 7 years old. He likes tornado sirens but hated to be called "Sammy Boy!" Tigerclaw64 has multiple drawing styles for Sam and the rest of her characters. Sam is a tall muscular 26 year old man, standing at 6'8" with jet black hair, his facial expression is usually stern and will get pissed easily.
- In the AceOfSpadesProduc100 universe, Microsoft Sam is the youngest brother of Mike, Mary, Pierre, Lili, Anna, David, Zira, Hazel, and David, and the cousin of Radar Overseer Scotty, and the best friend of Siri, Missingno, and Daxter5150, an arch enemy of the Supreme AI, and a few others. He will play as Mario in his family-made show.
- In the ShelltoonTV1 universe, Microsoft Sam is a former veteran with a serious profanity streak. Microsoft Sam is not president of the United Lols of Roflica, but rather Microsoft Mary is in charge since the 2008 election when Sam left office. Now he serves as Roflica's top spy, and is also doubling as a campaign manager for Bacon. Sam also has a preference for gyros as opposed to tacos, because the Indian Head's tacos did not go well with his stomach.
- In Vsaucewinner's upcoming universe, Sam and Mary are blood brother/sister, while Mike and Scotty are their cousins. He also uses profanity in amounts that rivals Thunderbirds101. The other voices are a hybrid of Thunderbirds101/nkrs200's versions. He also loves cats, unlike any other Sam's. Unlike the others, he does not mind reading errors/signs/etc. In fact, it's a hobby of his. But, there is 1 crucial difference: he HATES davemadson's and Go! Animate's versions of him (if they are seen, he kills them, but then Vsaucewinner blasts him with his Private Shoop Da Whoop Cannon Mark V) He also enjoys games like World of Warcraft, Rift, Aion, and others.
- In jemgirl8588's universe, Sam is a multi-mega personality that lives in ROFL City, CA, and does pretty much everything with his best friends, Mike and Mary. He is a singer, actor, businessman, reality star, fashion designer, and super-cool celeb. He, Mike, and Mary are the hot topic of the paparazzi (or the ROFLrazzi) and there is hardly a tabloid published without one mention of Sam, or him, Mike, and Mary.
- In xXCreeperHunterXx's universe, Sam is based very similarly off of nkrs200's Sam. And in the same time stream, as well. Due to the fact that his TV Studios are flooded with Pokemon (brought from his girlfriend), he is very psycho at times. He may be an ally of nkrs200, but he cannot see him very often.
- Microsoft Sam makes 2 cameos from EAS's YouTube Channel. On the "Six part EAS alert" during the nuclear attack of United LOLs-of-ROFLica, Sam appears as the President of the United LOLs-of-ROFLica making a speech. And at the EAS Civil Emergency Message about the "Water tap jams" The "police are looking for a person by the name of Sam. Sam is 6 ft tall with 7 inches and red eyes" but if a resident sees Sam they have to contact to the other police to arrest him.
- In Spencer Harman's Universe, Microsoft Sam is a depressed belligerent man. If he comes across a terrible choice, he would say "I'd rather <insert verb here> my Diarrhea Infested Toilet instead of that. But if Sam sees or hears the word taco, (Even if he says it) he will lose his mind and mindlessly eats tacos. If he mindlessly eats tacos, he will refuse to let anyone bother him while he eats his tacos.
- In MalachiThornsburgTV's Universe, Microsoft Sam doesn't want anyone but himself to read errors. Coming on the first Funny Windows Errors, Joshua Wilson reads an error for himself, but then Sam shoots him, and then reads the errors himself, until Bacon showed up (and it is a PowerPoint glitch of the brown/black background for the first few seconds) and annoys him. Microsoft Sam is literally careless, but in the first Stupid Street Signs, Sam's car smashes to a hard place because of a penguin. MTTV's Sam does the profanity lines, the slow "What?" and even Censored Warfares (an idea from TB101, and nkrs200.)
- In PixelartBuilder583's universe, Microsoft Sam is a computer who has more of a main interest in playing Minecraft rather than reading errors. However, Sam usually reads errors in a monthly basis when he has the time for errors to come up in his system. When Sam, Mike, Mary and Scotty play Left 4 Dead 2, Sam takes the role of Nick and he wants the M60 a lot. While playing Minecraft, Sam has diamond weapons and armor that is unbreakable and impossible to be destroyed by any physical means. The first few villains that Sam and his friends have faced were unique from other universes (until the first half of Season 4 of Microsoft Sam Plays Minecraft). He even has a pet horse known as "Gardash" as additional companionship to Mike, Mary, Scotty, Robert, Fire, and many other friends, including PixelartBuilder583 himself. If Sam fights mobs with his bow or ROFL Sword, he gets cocky against them and tells them the same things, such as "Camping at the <insert place here> will only earn you bloody scars". Most frequently, he threatens to hurt Scotty if he kept mentioning baloney sandwiches so many times throughout Sam's adventures out of his house until he comes back home with the gang.
- In TheNitroFlamer's universe, Microsoft Sam is very different from most incarnations of Sam in both appearance and behavior. He is foul, and because of that, unemployed. He is the brother of Mike and was once dating Mary. This incarnation of Sam is more foul mouthed, irresponsible and violent, as once shooting Scotty, in fact, he is rather violent to Scotty on any occasion and Bacon every occasion. Not much is seen on this depiction of Sam other than a mishap with Scotty and a non-canon shooting of Bacon, other than that, this version of Sam is rarely seen, and is not well known.
- In Aginnon's universe, he is the secondary founder of Aginnon films inc. He's the brother of Mike and had a sister, Mary. He was a fan of the Official Playstation Magazine, however it went down on March 2004. He owns a original PAL region PS1 in his world before Agi left to Michigan, and in Michigan he has a NTSC-U PS2, a model 2 Sega CD with 10 games total and importantly a US region N64. In order to play on his Sega CD, he needs to use a CRT television, but for a NTSC-U PS2 and N64, he uses his HD television. He wears Mike's shirt (since he borrowed it from him) and dark grey pants. He's able to survive a crash from a first generation Dodge Ram, but he's un-killable how matter someone tries. Mike and Mary can survive bullet-based projectiles thanks to their bulletproof armour. Sam's powers are: to be able to use a skateboard properly, can drive with police on his tail or swerve left to right to avoid, uses guns, although Mike hates grenades, he likes molotov cocktails (he refers them as petrol bombs). Sam also likes driving 4 by 4 cars, like the Land Rover Defender, or a Jeep Grand Cherokee. Aside from pistols and rifles, he uses shotguns, like an Spas 12 (used in the film Doublecross on Costa's Island), or a modified Remington shotgun that can use explosive shells.
- In the DAU, Sam is in a polyamorous relationship with Mike and Mary. The most stubborn of the three, he doesn't stop once his mind is set on something. Sasha tends to say that his soul is "110% determination."
- In the NTEXTtospeech Universe, Microsoft Sam always likes IWAY Cookies and tacos, he's gone crazy on NTEXTtospeech's Seigents Series, he is doing whatever he wants on the MS Sam Short Series. Sam. On the Unbelievable News Series, when the article is this: (e.g The IWAY Cookie/Taco Factory is Shut Down) Sam will rage so hard then 0.
- In the Koopa Bros Universe, Microsoft Sam does not have an addiction to tacos. Instead, he tends to love buffalo wings. However, he still likes I-Way Cookies.
Aside from reading errors and signs, Microsoft Sam has done all sorts of strange wacky things, like watching videos and commenting on them. He has also been known to go on adventures with Microsoft Mike and Mary (as well as with Anna). He also takes on the Role of Coach in Pieboy6000's series, where Sam, Mike, Mary and Scotty Play L4D2. Also, in the kittykat29 universe, he fights Microsoft Frog alongside Clippy, Mike, Mary, Scotty, and eventually kittykat29 herself.
ThunderBirds101's interpretation of Microsoft Sam has appeared in the M.U.G.E.N  universe. The character was originally released by an infamous mugen creator called ButthenIdied, who became notorious for his low quality characters on average. After late 2011, the character was found by Weegeeisgoingtokillm , who edited him to be made slightly better (Known as Microsoft Sam SP1 ) and is now known as the guy who made Microsoft Sam's M.U.G.E.N. character. Later, a user by the name of Jenngra505 made a private edit of Microsoft Sam that makes his character much much better. This version is known as Microsoft Sam SP2. Another was made by AngryNoahs, who also made a Davemadson Sam. These characters are pretty basic, but the regular version is very cheap.
- I hate shorts, I would never wear shorts, I hate shorts, I will never wear shorts!
- What the hell?
- HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHASOISOISOISOISOI! (his laugh line)
- No Peelz here!
- SOI! (getting crotch kicked)
- YOOOOOOOOOU'RE FIRED!
- GODDAMNITSONOFABITCHPIECEOFSHITMOTHERFUCKINGASSHOLEFUCKFUCKFUCK! (his profanity line)
- Whatever if this skull thinks about giving me anymore trouble. I will give him a copy of Bendyournoodle's Greatest Unshmexy hits volume 69.
- Let's all go out for some frosted chocolate milkshakes... OH MY MOTHER FUCKING GOD!
- Don't call me Sammy Boy!
- You better shut up, you crazy lady. (Referring to Microsoft Mike.)
- Go yank your cock through your ass, you fucking butt mongrel.
- Err... hmm... oh god... err.... oh! I know. It was Scotty! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA TRLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL SOI SOI SOI!
- 3 words. Modern Warfare 2. XDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!
- God damn it Scotty! YOU brainless idiot, you crashed the car!
- My fellow ROFLicans. This has been an really dark day even with this sucky virus.
- Take it easy Sam... stay, cool. Uh oh, tantrum in 5,4,3,2,1....
- Only...one...thing...to...say... (before the spaz)
- My Roficopter goes soi soi soi soi soi soi.
- Oh crotch/sphincter/rectum/leprosy/diabetes/esophagus/diarrhea/gluteus maximus/scabies/straps/chokes!